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family circle and with their daily connections. "Are they good-humored
and kind--able to bear the troubles they meet with? Are they
industrious, frugal, temperate, religious, chaste? Have they had the
prudence to insure against sickness and death?" Or, on the other hand,
are they addicted to drinking, smoking, betting, keeping late hours,
frequenting casinos, etc.? Your mother and other prudent friends will
assist you to find this out. Those who do not come up to the proper
standard, however agreeable they may be as acquaintance, certainly
cannot make good husbands. In company of such, it behooves you to be
well on your guard, and accept no attention from them. Should you
marry such a one, you would be sure to be miserable.
While, however, it is quite right that you should be careful about the
character of the young man who is paying court to you, it is of far
more importance to you that you should be careful about your own, and
this whether you marry or not. Indeed, a chief object in our being
placed in this world is that we may acquire good habits, and so be
fitted to associate with the just made perfect in heaven!
Be very guarded in your actions and demeanor. Cultivate purity of
heart and thought.
No woman is fit to become a wife who is not perfectly modest in word,
deed, and thought. No young man, who is worth having, would ever
entertain the thought for a moment of taking the girl for a wife who
is habitually careless in her conversation and displays a levity in
her manners. Young men may like your free and hearty girls to laugh
and talk with, but as to taking one for a wife, let me assure you they
would not tolerate the idea for a moment.
You may at times be unavoidably compelled to hear a vulgar word spoken
or an indelicate allusion made; in every instance maintain a rigid
insensibility. It is not enough that you should cast down your eyes or
turn your head, you must act as if you did not hear it; appear as if
you did not comprehend it. You ought to receive no more impression
from remarks of this character than a block of wood. Unless you
maintain this standing, and preserve this high-toned purity of manner,
you will be greatly depreciated in the opinion of all men whose
opinion is worth having, and you deprive yourself of much influence
and respect which it is your privilege to possess and exert.
COURTSHIP, AFTER ALL, IS A MOMENTOUS MATTER.
After taking all the counsel that may be offered, you must at last, in
a great measure, rely on your own judgment. Within a few short months
you have to decide, from what you can see of a man, whether you will
have him in preference to your parents, friends, and all others that
you know, to be a life companion. What can you do? How shall you
judge? How arrive at a correct conclusion? My dear young girl, there
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